


Last Station

by mecchi



Category: Super Junior
Genre: 83line, Bittersweet, Happy Ending, M/M, Sort of sad, happy anniversary sj, i'm late
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-24 03:02:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16631645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mecchi/pseuds/mecchi
Summary: When Heechul sees Leeteuk again, the sun is shining brightly and they are much much older.





	Last Station

**Author's Note:**

> Started this on SJ's 13th anniversary but only now had the time to sit and post. This is set up in the future.
> 
> English is not my first language so some phrases and gammars might seem odd. Do point out anything out of place and I will fix it. This work is a pure fiction and derived from my imagination. Sorry for any inaccuracies and OOC-ness

When Heechul sees Leeteuk again, the sun is shining brightly and they are much, much older. Years had passed and Heechul can only remember fuzzily the way Leeteuk speak or the way Leeteuk laugh but when he sees him again, everything just rushes back.

 

There isn't any explosion of sound or any sudden boom of colours but Heechul sees Leeteuk's back and finally he can breathe with ease again.

 

He calls him Leeteuk, but the man doesn't turn, and there is a pang in his chest when he realizes that Leeteuk is no longer using that name and has not been using it for more than a decade now. So he calls him correctly, the word Jungsoo rolling effortlessly from his tongue and Leeteuk, no, _Jungsoo_ , finally turns around.

 

For a second, Heechul worries that Jungsoo doesn't recognize him, that Jungsoo might have forgotten but Jungso takes one look at him and he smiles. His eyes crinkles as he smiles that smile that made his face light up with pure joy and Heechul sighs in relief.

 

If Heechul is thirty years younger, he would have run and hug the heck out of Jungsoo.

 

But they had aged. He looks at Jungsoo and realizes how time had passed. He stares at what used to be smooth skin is now decorated with wrinkles and what used to be hair styled and dyed many colours had changed into a head full of short grey hair. Self conciously, he tugs his hat, adjusting it to hide his dyed hair away as he hobbles closer, cane thudding heavily on the ground.

 

"Heechul-ah," his voice is different but familiar and when Jungsoo reaches out with a hand, Heechul takes it only to feel it toughened by life and time. Jungsoo is both different yet the same and Heechul cannot find his voice because this is not his Jungsoo but it is his Jungsoo at the same time.

 

"You found me," Jungsoo says warmly and Heechul cannot do anything else besides nodding dumbly

 

"Found you."

 

"Are you alone?" Heechul doesn't miss the way Jungsoo looks at the car parked at the mouth of the gravelled road as if hoping for more people to come out and Heechul thinks back in regret when he outright denied Donghae's request to follow. Guiltily, he nods. Jungsoo face falls slightly and Heechul feels bad for him but then he shrugs, nonchalant, as if he is used to being disappointed and pulls Heechul towards a small modest house at the end of the road.

 

Naturally, Heechul follows, like what he did in his twenties and thirties but couldn't in his forties and fifties. They walk side by side, Jungsoo's calloused hand warm and heavy in Heechul's grasp. Their walk on the uneven ground is a teeny bit painful for Heechul but Jungsoo makes everything better, always had and always will.

 

Jungsoo's steps are slower now and his tone had mellowed even more and it takes him some time to remember words and names but Jungsoo still chatters away, asking about Sungmin's first granddaughter (who is utterly adorable), Shindong's chicken franchise (it was touch and go for a while but the business is recovering), Siwon's retirement (he is bored and keeps bugging everyone in the group chat) and other little things about everyone that crosses his mind. Heechul realizes then that he is the only one who doesn't keep in touch with Jungsoo, the only one to drop Jungsoo like a hot coal and never looked back.

 

Back then, he had made himself stop thinking about Jungsoo because thinking, talking and contacting Jungsoo would have made him a loser in a game that he now knows he had played alone. Looking at Jungsoo now, he knows that there is no winner, that time had taken everything and left only bitter memories.

 

So he holds on a little tighter, and walk even slower than he needs to so Jungsoo could ask and ask to his heart's content. They reaches the small house eventually but Jungsoo doesn't stop talking and Heechul lets him because he know Jungsoo has no one else to talk to.

 

Just like that, a couple hours went by and it is already past lunch time. Jungsoo only realizes it wheen he accidentally looks at the old clock on the wall and Heechul watches amusedly as Jungsoo smacks his forehead, annoyed at himself because he had not served anything to Heechul besides warm tea.

 

Heechul smiles as Jungsoo bustles in his little kitchen, muttering to himself but his smile disappears when he stares at Jungsoo's small back as he hunches over the surprisingly modern rice cooker. That small back had carried all of them for more than a decade and in a way, still carries them even when he was no longer there.

 

It still stings when he thinks about the day Jungsoo left. He used to live in agony every single day until he learnt to live with it, until the stabbing pain became a constant dull ache much like the pain in his knee.

 

Jungsoo had left and, much like Heechul, didn't look back. Heechul could not understand it back then, confused and hurt and so lost when suddenly, there is no Jungsoo by his side anymore. Super Junior no longer had a leader and everything was just pure chaos. Tears were shed and Heechul's parting words were filled with anger and hatred. But he can understand now, now that they are sixty plus years. It was easy to hold a grudge when he was young but one day, he woke up and he realized he couldn't see the ceiling clearly and it scared the shit out of him because his time is running out. Their time is running out.

 

Regret is a funny thing, you couldn't go back and change anything but oh God, you really want to. It kept him up at night becaue he knew what he needed to do but for some time, he refused to do it. And now, all he has are should haves. Heechul doesn't have many regrets but letting himself be angry at Jungsoo for years is the biggest regret he would carry to his deathbed.

 

Fifteen years had passed and Jungsoo had spent those long years alone, with no tv or radio, no computer or smartphone. He had no one to look after him and no one to care for. Just him and his thoughts. But it seems like Jungsoo had made peace with whatever demons that made him left because his steps are lighter and his voice happier than Heechul could remember. Or so, Heechul hopes.

 

He snaps out of his thought when the cooker beeps loudly, steam spraying out from the top. Jungsoo quickly serves him piping hot rice with kimchi and a small serving of chicken, all the while rubbing his neck in embarrassement, muttering about the last portion of chicken because market day is tomorrow and his fridge and pantry had become sparse. Heechul laughs at the confession because it is so Jungsoo to have a schedule for everything and to have everything planned to a T.

 

"It's okay," he says and pulls Jungsoo to sit so that they can eat together, sharing the rice, chicken and everything else. It wasn't a five star meal that Heechul had gotten used to but he doesn't complain because Jungsoo had made it from scratch for him to eat using everything he has. So he eats everything and takes pleasure at the way Jungsoo could not stop smiling as he clears the empty plates and bowls. He wipes his mouth and realizes that he too had been mellowed down by time, an awareness that comforts him.

 

When Jungsoo serves apples cut into small pieces the way Heechul prefers it, he finally asks the one question Heechul knows he had been itching to ask.

 

"Are you staying the night?" it was asked full of hope and Heechul knows right there and then that Jungsoo also regrets many things in his life, that Jungsoo also realizes how they are nearing the end of their road. His heart thuds loudly in his ribcage as he stares at Jungsoo.  _This is it._ This is the reason why he had mustered the courage to finally meet Jungsoo.

 

"Yes I am."

 

"Tomorr-"

 

"I'm staying forever."

 

Jungsoo laughs then, choking up and trying to wipe his eyes discreetly and Heechul is instantly warmed up by the sound of Jungsoo trying and failing to articulate his happiness. They hug and Heechul can feel his eyes getting misty as Jungsoo finally abandons all pretense and starts sobbing like the crybaby he is.

 

"I had been waiting for you," Jungsoo confesses between words of 'I love you-s' and 'I miss you-s' and Heechul holds him tighter because Jungsoo is precious and he doesn't have to wait any longer because Heechul is here. It took him some time but he is finally here.

 

They were friends, then lovers, then nothing. But now, they can be something again. It doesn't matter that they might have mere days or decades left. He had finally reaches Jungoo after all these years and there is nowhere else for him to be.

 

Jungsoo is his end goal and he is finally home.

**Author's Note:**

> The picture of Leeteuk bowing ninety degrees at SS7 Encore in Bangkok made me super emotional. It blew my breath away. I look at him and realized how strong he really is. He amazes me, he makes me want to live, his strength gives me strength to go on.
> 
> I wish for all joy and love in this world upon him and may he no longer experience heartache.
> 
> Go on forever, Super Junior, I will be here for you until the end of time.


End file.
